River And The Banner Man

Or: BBC Gives The Weeping Angels Something To Cry About
Or: How I Leaned To Stop Worrying And Love Graham Norton.
Or: Non Angeli Sed Angry!
Or: Need To Install Norton Pop-Up Blocker?
Or: BBC In The DOG-House.

Alternative ways to make use of banner adverts.

1. Stop the banner from obscuring the on-screen action by swapping the position of the banner and the television programme.

2. State the blindingly obvious.

3. Make the on-screen action more immersive, as in this shot from The Impossible Planet.

4. Give information which may be useful to know.

In Other News
BBC Release Preview Pictures Of Next Saturday's Episode

And Now A Word From Our Sponsor

It's Terrible Old Joke Wednesday

It's Wednesday 14th of April so, according to tradition, it's time to dig up some terrible old Atraxi jokes.



The Atraxi Leader hated wearing his glasses.


Q:What Do You Call A Three Eyed Atraxi?
A: Atraxiii !


Q:What Do You Call A No Eyed Atraxi?
A: Atrax !


The Atraxi Leader goes to the optician for an eye test. After a few basic tests the optician points to an eye chart and asks,” can you read the letters on this for me?”.
“ I can't see it,” replies the Atraxi leader.
So the optician gets a chart with bigger letters and points to it again,” can you read these letters?” he asks.
“No,” replies the Atraxi Leader,” I can't see those either.”
The optician gets the chart with the biggest letters he can find and holds it up,” surely you must be able to see these.”
“ I'm sorry but I still can't see them,” says the Atraxi Leader.
Frustrated the optician unzips his trousers and exposes himself,” can you see that,” he shouts.
“ Good grief, yes,” says the Atraxi Leader,” I can see THAT clearly.”
“ Well there's the problem,” says the optician,” you're cock-eyed.”

Amy Pond Kissogram: At Your Service

Lads* here’s your chance to get a snog with Amazing Pouting Amy Pond!

Now that The Eleventh Hour has revealed Amy works as a Kissogram, Shouting Into A Well is proud to give YOU a chance to dress Awesome Pneumatic Amy Pond in the costume of your dreams** and then kiss her!

Here’s how it works.

Cut out the picture to the left of Amy. She's dressed in her Policewoman costume and you COULD get a snog off her straight away but, just for fun, we've also provided a selection of alternate saucy costumes for you to choose from; as well as a few fun props which we think Amy might want to use.

Cut the costumes out, dress Amy in the costume of your choice, and pucker up.

It's literally that easy!

(note: you'll need to click on the images to see the full sized picture before cutting them out)






It's literally all in YOUR imagination! But remember, Kissograms often say a fun and saucy line before they deliver their message! For example, Naughty Policewoman Amy might say,"I'll have to TAKE DOWN your particulars". Don't worry if you can't think of anything for Amy to say at first, we've provided three to get you started.





* And lasses; Shouting Into A Well is proud to be a non-discriminatory purveyor of lechery to Doctor Who fans.
** Any similarity between this blog entry and Shouting Into A Well's earlier Dress Matt Smith is entirely co-incidental ish. Although thinking about it, if you wanted you could probably dress Matt Smith up and snog him as well, or not, as you prefer, or you could make Matt Smith snog Amy Pond! It’s a snogasbord!